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Danish Weddings (Part Three)

 

In Danish Weddings (Part One) we got hitched.  In Part Two, we started the party, with lots of kissing by all and sundry!

So, now, we’re busily tucking into our food.  Which, if it’s like 95% of the numerous Danish weddings I’ve been to, will be: a seafood or fish starter, beef or veal for the main course and chocolate cake/icecream for dessert.  In Jutland (the Danish mainland) the tradition is suppe, steg og is.  Soup, roast and icecream.  And – being Jutland - the serving staff will always come round with a second serving of the main course.  Hooray for that! :)

But don’t get too engrossed in the starter because – ching, ching, cough, cough – the Toastmaster has just announced the first in a very long line of speeches.  Oh, you thought there would only be three speeches: the Father of the Bride, the Best Man and the Groom?  Well, think again!  In Denmark, everyone can join in.  It could be a friend of the Bride, a former boss, Kirsten Giftekniv (the “Matchmaker”) who brought the Happy Couple together, an University chum, the Groom’s brother, the Best Man, colleagues…

Or all of the above – and more.  As happened at our wedding! ;)

And, ladies, remember those hankies!  Because you’re about to discover that Danish men are actually incredibly romantic.  When the Groom gives his speech, he’ll start off – selvfølgelig – with a few funny anecdotes.  But towards the end the whole atmosphere of the room will change and you’ll be able to hear a pin drop.  He’ll turn to his Bride and solemnly declare “Jeg elsker dig!” (“I love you!”)  Sniff, sniff, not a dry eye in the house!

And, hey, let’s give some credit to the unsung hero of the wedding party – the Toastmaster.  He really has his work cut out for him – working out an order of service, communicating with the kitchen staff (“Hold the roast pork, Moster Gerda is up next!”) and the keyboard player/DJ (“Stop the music, Bedstefar Ole wants to bring a toast!”) . 

No Danish wedding without a Toastmaster!

Phew – what a line up!  And - wait a minute - our Toastmaster also needs to fit in all those songs, specially written by the guests for the occasion…

More about those next time!

Diane :)

 

By Diane • May 22, 2013
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Danish Weddings (Part Two)

So, in Danish Weddings (Part One), I told you about the Danish marriage ceremony.

Now that we’ve said “Ja!” (Yes!) to each other and are officially married, what next?  Well, let’s get the party started, selvfølgelig! :)

Danish weddings involve lots and lots (and lots) of kissing.  You’ll need to keep your wits about you!

Keep your ears open:

Ching, ching!  Ching, ching, ching!   Someone starts tapping a knife on their wine glass or plate.  Then everyone joins in.  Ching, ching, ching, ching, ching, ching, ching, ching, chiiiiiiiiiing!  And you don’t stop making the noise until the Happy Couple get out of their seats, stand up on their chairs, carefully reach out towards one another (careful, mind you don’t fall!) and kiss.   Mwa!  And skål! (Cheers!)

Repeat at random.  Over.  And over.

Keep your eyes open:

You also need to keep your eye firmly fixed on the Bride and Groom.  If, at any point, the Groom leaves the room to go wee-wee, then it’s open season on the Bride!

The men dash over to her, and queue up to give her a kiss.

 

Given that we are in liberal Denmark and there is full equality, the opposite applies selvfølgelig if the Bride leaves the room.  Then all the ladies have a chance to go smooch the Groom.  You might want to make sure that the Bride and Groom are drinking plenty of water, so they’ll need to leave the room often.  Otherwise you’ll just have to lure them out under false pretences.  Perfectly acceptable!

Join me next time for the next round of Danish Wedding traditions!

Diane :)

 

By Diane • May 16, 2013
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Danish Weddings (Part One)

Yay, it’s wedding season!  :)   As my regular readers will know, I’m constantly amused and amazed by the quirky traditions of those crazy Danes.  From hitting barrels with baseball bats to sending secret snowdrop letters, tradesmen removing their shoes and marcipan pigs…  And Danish weddings are no exception – hooray!

Danish wedding anno 1975

Danish wedding anno 1975

Now, unfortunately, statistics say that over 40% of Danish marriages are doomed to end in divorce.  But, hey, many Danes go on to remarry – so let’s look on the bright side…even more weddings! ;)

So where does it all start?  Well, you can either get married in the Danish church (which also, by the way, performs same-sex marriages – halleluja! – an idea supported by a large majority of Danes) or at a civil cermony (usually at your local town hall, but can also be your back garden or at a hotel).  And you can - selvfølgelig – also choose to go the whole hog and do both!

The ceremony itself is short and sweet.  Forget all those toe-curling Hollywood film scenes where the bride and groom bumble through their marriage vows…  There are no lines to learn!  Those practical Danes get straight to the point.  The priest or mayor will give a little speech then ask you two questions: 

  • Do you take Morten/Christina to be your husband/wife?
  • Will you love and cherish him/her until death do you part?

.

And if you reply “Ja” (Yes) to both questions, you’re married – simple as that!

Oh, and don’t be surprised if the flower girls or ushers turn out to be the bride and groom’s own kids.  It’s very common for the Danes to get married after they have kids, not before.  Sometimes they even kill two birds with one stone and have a joint wedding/baby christening…

Join me next time when we’ll be getting ready to celebrate!

Diane :)

 

 

 

By Diane • May 13, 2013
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Back to the Books!

If you haven’t already heard or seen the jubilation of parents partying in the street, the LockOut of Danish teachers is finally over and my kids cycled off to school this morning at 7.30am -  hooray!  They were, of course, a tad sad to be going back after an unexpected hiatus of 5 weeks – not to mention very grumpy when they were dragged out of bed selvfølgelig – but resigned and looking forward to seeing their friends and getting back in to their groove.

On a side note: I had to laugh on Saturday night when we were watching Danish kids’ tv.  At the top of the screen was a countdown: 1 day, 12 hours, 38 minutes and 35 seconds until…school starts!  Yep, gotta love those crazy Danes and their warped sense of humour… ;)

Anyway, now that the kids are back to their textbooks, how about some other books?  (Y’all know how much I love Danish libraries - I promise not to mention them again!)  Free books.  From our local alfresco book trading posts!

Yep, Gentofte council has set up specially designed book trading posts - book ‘sculptures’ – around the commune. You can come and take books around the clock.  24 hours a day.  But, um, if I want to borrow a book in the wee, small hours, won’t it be too dark, I hear you say.  Why, no, because inside there are LED lamps which are powered by solar panels on the top!   Okay, I’m interested, so where do I get the key, I hear you ask.  No need – they aren’t locked – just help yourself! :)

You’re free to keep the books once you’ve finished reading them.  Or return them - along with any others you have lying around at home, collecting dust and clogging your feng shui.  But won’t it just turn into a giant junk heap of books, I hear your ask?  No, because a team of volunteers ensures that there is a good varied selection and rotates the stock. 

And  what can you expect to find?  An eclectic mix.  The occasional DVD, foreign languages books, plenty of crime and Agatha Christies, kids books and non-fiction.  From Dan Brown to Tolkien and everything in between.

It’s a ‘green’, self-sustaining project - which is absolutely dependent on trust.   (Indeed, part of the thinking behind the project is that it will actually help to promote trust in public spaces.)  Six-months down the road, it looks like a success.  No vandalism and lots of happy customers!

Happy Monday – whether you have your nose in an ebook or a free book!

Diane :)

 

By Diane • April 29, 2013
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Danish Big Prayer Day – what are you praying for?

Denmark will be closed this Friday (26 April 2013).  Not that Danish schoolkids will actually notice any difference…  After all, they’ve been at home from school – slowly turning into zombies - for over a month now due to the LockOut of the Danish school teachers!

But I digress!  What is happening on Friday?  Well, it’s time for the strangest holiday on the Danish religious calendar… Stor Bededag.  ’Big Prayer Day’!  Yep, those crazy Danes decided back in 1686 that there were just too many religious holidays during the year so they lumped the minor ones together, four weeks after Easter.  Makes sense to me ;)

Big Prayer Day was traditionally a time to fast and pray.  Hee hee!  I’ve yet to meet a Dane who willingly goes to church (apart – selvfølgelig – from christenings, confirmations and weddings).  Most people will spend the day gardening or working on a DIY project.  Or will make a day trip to Sweden, where it’s business as usual and cash registers will be working overtime.

Even if the Danes don’t pray on Friday, they will – because they love and defend their traditions with a vengeance – eat hveder on Thursday night.  Large, fluffy rolls which you halve, toast and butter.  They’re already on sale at the bakers…but they don’t come cheap!  (And they all taste pretty bland, so I normally just buy the cheap ones from the supermarket – it’s the thought that counts after all?)

And after you’ve had your hveder, you’re supposed to go for a stroll around the city ramparts at Kastellet (Copenhagen Citadel). You don’t live near Kastellet?  Well, sit back, relax and enjoy Denmark’s finest rock band, Magtens Korridorer singing about a picnic at the Citadel…  (If the guy pretending to sing in the video looks familiar, it’s Nicholas Bro, an actor who was in the The Killing (II) and Borgen…


 

And what about the prayer part?  Will I be saying a prayer come Friday?  Well, just like all the other mothers of Danish schoolkids, I’ll be praying that our kids are soon back to school! ;)

God Stor Bededag!

Diane :)

 

By Diane • April 24, 2013
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Danish Teachers are (still) Locked Out!

 

The ‘LockOut’ of Danish Teachers continues…three weeks with no school!   (Haven’t heard about it?  Get up to speed with Time for School…but no teachers allowed! and  LockOut of Danish Teachers…Child’s Play? )

At first we thought – selvfølgelig – that the LockOut would never happen – it was all just fighting talk.  Then, it happened – and we thought it would blow over after a couple of days.  We’ve now had three whole weeks of it - will it ever end?!

I chummed my daughter over to school the other day.  She had one lesson in Maths, from 10.35 till 11.20 (her Maths teacher is a civil servant, one of the hallowed few allowed in to teach during the dispute).  I have to say that it was all very eerie – the playground was a ghosttown and the numerous ‘fight-for-a-space’ bike parks were now empty!

Room for plenty more!

Room for plenty more!

But why all the coloured pennants?  Did I miss a memo, was there a spring fête?  

Teachers LockOut continues

Teachers LockOut continues

On each pennant there’s the name of a child name and their class.   680 pennants.  That’s one for each of the 680 students that go to our school.   With banners saying “Vi savner Jer ♥ ” (We miss you ♥).  A hand-made greeting for the students from their teachers.  Teachers who still aren’t allowed in, for the third week running.

Vi savner Jer - We miss you

Vi savner Jer - We miss you

So, will this LockOut ever end?  Well, rumour has it that the LockOut will be over next week.  Because we’re fast approaching the first of May – International Workers’ Day - a day held high, and celebrated, by many Danes – not least our current socialist Danish Government.  A continuation of the LockOut would be terrible publicity.  But, for me, all bets are off.  Just like the Danish summer, I’ll believe it when I see it! ;)

Have a fantastic school-free Friday and a wonderful weekend!

Diane :)

 

 

By Diane • April 19, 2013
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Forårskriller – Spring Tickles – Koldskål!

Not only has the sun finally made more than a fleeting appearance in Denmark this week – but it seems as though the grumpy old evening frost has gone for good and that temperatures are slowly but surely crawling their way up, woo hoo! :)

Which, as usual, basically mean winter coats and gloves in the morning on the way to school.  [Umm, or actually not on the way to school - because our kids' teachers are still locked out from school for the third week running = no lessons!]  Try again…winter coats, boots and gloves in the morning on the way to work.   Then take them all off in the afternoon and grab an icecream on the way home.

But if you want something that is quintessentially Danish to soothe those forårskriller – ‘spring tickles’ – then what better than a bowl of koldskål?   Don’t know what that is?  Here’s my post about it from last April, when the temperatures were even higher… Velbekomme!  

A taste of Danish summer

(first published 27 April 2012)

The Danish weather gods are on a roll! For the past week we’ve had sun, blue skies and temperatures of around 20 degrees celcius. Shorts and sandals (and bare legs – eek!) have been brought out of hiding.  We’ve been eating lunch and dinner in the garden. And fighting over the seats in the shade.  Out on the street you can’t move for bikes, skateboards, scooters and rollerblades.  And the best part?  According to the Danish Meteorological Institute, it looks like the fabulous weather is going to continue.  At least for another 3 or 4 days, yay! :)

And with our first taste of summer weather comes…our first ‘taste’ of summer – koldskål!

image

The Danes have been eating koldskål for over a hundred years.  Personally, I love the name.  Kold = Cold.  Skål = Bowl.  Koldskål = Cold bowl!

It’s traditionally made with buttermilk, raw eggs, sugar, vanilla and lemon.  Today you buy it readymade from the supermarket.  And the Danes buy lots of it.  Millions and millions of liters of it during the summer months. When the temperatures start to rise, so do the sales of koldskål…  And what does it taste like?  Hmm, even though I’m a ‘Dairy Queen’ (pass the cream, please, and yes, I’ll have a little bread with my butter), koldskål is definitely an aquired taste.  A weird mixture of sweet and sour. But a very ‘fresh’ taste. It looks like thin yoghurt and you normally serve it in a bowl and throw a handful of little crispy biscuits called Kammerjunkere (available from the supermarket or bakers) over the top.  Or a few strawberries.

image

You can eat it for lunch or dinner.  Or as a mid-morning or afternoon snack. Or drop the kammerjunkere and just drink it straight out of a glass.  Some people even eat it for breakfast. In our house we usually eat it after dinner, for dessert.

My kids aged 9 and 11 are addicted to it – we’re already on our second carton this week.  But hey, when the weather is this good, who’s counting?

Velbekomme! :D

……………………………………….

Diane :)

By Diane • April 17, 2013
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LockOut of Danish Teachers…Child’s play?

 

Last time I told you about the LockOut of Danish teachers - and what the teachers have been up to, since they’re not allowed to come in to school to teach.

But what about the students?  Well, my kids have been in school for the official classes taught by the teachers’ who aren’t ‘locked out’.   Which for my DS13 (dear son, aged 13) means a double period of Natur og Teknik (nature/technology/science) and a double period of Idræt (gymclass).  That’s it.  Four hours in the whole week! ;)   DD11 (dear daughter, aged 11) has slightly more…five hours of Matematik (maths).  The rest of the hours are tilsyn (supervised), i.e. the kids are basically left to their own (electronic – boom boom!) devices.   Yep, the school has said they should bring in computers, Nintendos, books, games etc because they’ll basically be sitting on their own all day - with a teacher on call somewhere in the building. 

Expedition to see...Kon-Tiki Expedition!

Expedition to see...Kon-Tiki Expedition!

Attendance at the tilsynstimer (supervised hours) is not obligatory so we’re basically homeschooling…  The kids and their classmates are here every day.   We’ve baked bread, rolls and cakes – hjemmekundskab (Home Economics).  Trips to the local swimming pool - idræt (gymclass).   Luckily the film Kon-Tiki has just been released here – Natur og Teknik (nature/technology/science).  One set of parents invited all the boys from the class to make food in their kitchen/in their garden over a bonfire…  And, being an English teacher, I’ve selvfølgelig been giving mini-lessons.

So, we’re two weeks in.  With no end in sight.  Because the teachers and local communes are still at loggerheads and the Danish government won’t intervene.  At first the kids thought it was great fun…just like the long, summer holidays with late nights and no early mornings!  But now even they are getting bored.  Hey, I’m a teacher - I’m missing my students – sniff, sniff!  And on the news they reported that Danish grannies and grandads had had quite enough of looking after the little ‘uns, thank you very much…

Yep, this LockOut is definitely not child’s play! ;)  

Have a great weekend!

Diane

By Diane • April 13, 2013
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Time for school…but no teachers allowed!

 

Yaaaaaaaaawn.  It’s 8am Tuesday morning and my kids are still in bed.  When they should really be sat behind their desks learning, amongst other things, the intricacies of the Danish comma!   What’s up?  Well, we’re now into the second week of the LockOut of Danish teachers.  Local government want to change teachers’ working hours (well, actually, the ratio of class prep vs. time spent teaching students).  The teachers unions are basically in disagreement, and talks broke down.  Local government want to push through the changes and have therefore ’locked out’ the teachers – i.e. they are not allowed to come in to teach.  And they aren’t being paid.  And why doesn’t the Danish government intervene?  Well, this is the so-called “Danish model”.  Employers and employees negotiating their own collective agreements without state interference.

So just what are our teachers up to, now that they don’t have any classes to prepare or students to teach?

For lækker til Lockout! - Too cool/sexy to be locked out!

For lækker til Lockout! - Too cool/sexy to be locked out!

My kids teachers have been demonstrating in front of the school and at the major traffic hubs during rush hours.   Motorists were encouraged to peep their horns if they were in agreement with the teachers.  And cyclists and pedestrians weren’t forgotten either…the teachers had taken coloured chalks and written messages on the pavements and the cycle paths!

Jeg savner mine elever - I miss my students

Jeg savner mine elever - I miss my students

 

The Danish teachers have a website http://lockouten.dk/ where you can see all their “Lockout” events and happenings.  At 12 noon today they performed Denmark’s largest ever flash mob at Town Hall Square in the centre of Copenhagen.  Unfortunately that particular video isn’t up yet on youtube (keep looking – meanwhile you can see it on http://politiken.dk/poltv/nyheder/indland/ECE1941612/danmarks-stoerste-flashmob-se-laererne-smide-tusinder-af-boeger-paa-jorden/) so instead here are some teachers doing the LockOut Harlem Shake.  As they say themselves, they would really much rather be…teaching! ;)

 

Have a wonderful Wednesday.  School or no school!

Diane :)

By Diane • April 10, 2013
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Gækkebrev = Secret Snowdrop Letters!

My kids are now on Easter break – which, this year, is threatening to turn into a very, very long break for some.  Local government and the teachers’ union are at loggerheads and, if things aren’t resolved by Easter Monday, Danish schools will be operating a  ‘lock out’: teachers will be turned away and will not receive pay.  And what does that mean for the pupils?  Well, some schools will tell the kids to stay at home, whilst others will try to arrange supervision by non-union staff… 

But, as usual, I digress!  We are – selvfølgelig – in the run up to Easter so I’m bringing out my old post on how to make gækkebreve - a purely Danish tradition!  Yep, little kids all over Denmark have been sitting at home (or nursery, school, museum or the local library) cutting holes in paper and drawing lots of dots…all in the hope of getting a chocolate Easter egg! :)

Want to have a go at making a gækkebrev (secret snowdrop letter)? Then grab those scissors and lets get started…

You’ll need:

  • white and coloured paper
  • glue or a gluestick
  • a pair of scissors
  • a snowdrop

 

Choose a coloured piece of paper for your paper ‘doily’.  Fold it in half, then in half again. Draw a rough shape and cut out.  If you’ve never done this kind of thing before, keep it simple!  The Danes are world-famous for their intricate papercutting. Hans Christian Andersen (you know, the one who wrote all those fairytales) was also an expert at papercutting.  I’ve only lived here for 15 years, so I’m still learning…

Open up up the paper and you should have something that looks like this.

Stick it on to a plain white piece of paper.  I used a gluestick.  And it’s fine if it isn’t perfectly stuck down all over – it just gives it an even better 3d effect ;)

Then you write a little poem on it.

Henne bag ved havens hæk, fandt jeg denne vintergæk.
Hej, min hvide lille ven, nu er turen din igen.
Du skal gå til min ven, hviske så kan kan forstå,
han må gætte prikke små, for et påskeæg at få!
 
But if your family and friends aren’t Danish, you’ll probably want one in English, right?  Try this one for size:
.
Snowdrop, snowdrop, snowdrop fine,
Omen true of hope divine,
From the heart of winter bring
Thy delightful hope of spring.
Guess my name I humbly beg.
Your reward: An Easter-Egg.
Let these puzzling dots proclaim
Every letter in my name
 
As you can see, you don’t sign your name.  You draw a large dot for every letter of your name.  If the person who receives the letter guesses who it comes from, you have to give them an Easter egg.  But if they can’t guess, they have to give you an Easter egg. So disguise your handwriting and be creative! I put in three dots for M.U.M.! ;)
.
The final touch is to pick a snowdrop from your garden – um, if you can actually find one underneath all the snow we had last week - or draw one if need be, add it to the letter and send to a friend.  And keep your fingers crossed that they don’t guess who it’s from…
.
 
God Påske! Happy ……!
 
Diane :)

By Diane • March 25, 2013
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Diane's Daily Denmark

Diane

Daily Denmark...living with those crazy Danes! Never serious, always informative. A Scot who fell in love with a Dane while working in Luxembourg. Permanently settled in Copenhagen and Mum to two little Vikings. I ♥ Denmark!